Wardrobe Malfunction

So I almost went to church without a shirt on yesterday.

OK technically I was wearing a tank top. But not exactly what you would consider "Sunday best."

Let me explain. Sunday mornings, I'm a single parent. My kids still have a wonderful, loving, and involved father, but being a pastor, he's just very much otherwise occupied with churchy things. So it's my job to get all of us ready, pack diaper/entertainment bags, prep for Sunday School or playing piano some weeks...you get the picture. Our house is about as Sabbath-like as LaGuardia on Sunday mornings.

Yesterday, I wanted to wear a sweater that I had just rescued from its summer home, neatly wrapped in tissue in my cedar chest. Or maybe it was wadded up on the top shelf of my closet since last February. One or the other. Anyway, it needed a little freshening up, so I tossed it in the dryer and proceeded to dress our barn cats in sweaters for a Christmas card picture. Just kidding, that would be easy. Really I was subjecting the kids to a unique form of torture that involved getting DRESSED. In actual CLOTHES. With BUTTONS. Evil, aren't I???

I made it as far as shoes before the first crisis. "They're too TIIIIIIIGHT!! Make it LOOSER!!! Noooooooo not like that, like the OTHER ONE!!! LOOSER!!!" We finally compromised with barely attached Velcro and moved on to Sarah's coat. Picture wrestling a 23-pound trout into an adorable purple puffy coat, only the trout has SHOES. And TEETH.

So that's done (never speak of it again!) I slide my shoes on, grab my coat...and realize I'm missing that elusive article of clothing, the aforementioned sweater. In the time it takes me to grab it from the dryer, Sarah poops (WHY did I put tights on her???) and Noah tries repeatedly to take himself to church (we live next door, so it's not like he stole the car keys, but still!)

We made it. In one piece. And dressed, more or less. As for surviving worship services with two small children...that's a post for another day, especially since I got off easy and pawned them off on kindhearted church members so I could play the piano yesterday. 

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to put pants on and go to play group. Have a great day :-)